I awoke to a scripture fragment. I am so glad for online bible search engines. As you can tell with my references, I use BlueLetterBible a lot, because they can give you a lot of options for viewing, comparing translations, even advanced searching. So what I located was the fragment from Psalm 31, the first part of verse 17 to be precise “Let me not be put to shame, O LORD, for I call upon You;” (NASB)
Every time I tell someone about relying on the Lord for a house and a home, I feel shame more and more. Some are locked into the semi-deist, or semi-cessationalist views. God doesn’t do that stuff anymore. And even if He did do stuff, it would have to be something spiritual, not just giving someone the opportunity to move out of an apartment and into a nice house. And even if giving a house and home was spiritual, it would be a hovel so that you wouldn’t get proud. And even if, He chose to give something that wasn’t a hovel, then He would give it to someone who has done something visible and significant for His name, and His children. No. No. No. It just can’t be a luxurious house for you and your son, and whatever it takes to make it into a home.
Though I want to direct my anger outwards, toward some friends who seem to have implied that, the truth is that the part that hurts the most is that my mind goes in those patterns too.
So all of the things that David says in Psalm 31 about his enemies, I may be one of the lead enemies myself. To paraphrase Pogo on April 22, 1971 ‘I have met one of my enemies, and he is me.’
But there is a recognition by David in Psalm 31 that he is an enemy to himself, and to God with verses like 10 “For my life is spent with sorrow, And my years with sighing; My strength has failed because of my iniquity, And my body has wasted away.” Knowing that I am part of the problem doesn’t take away the exhaustion of seemingly endless sorrow.
When I talk to this one particular friend, we often remark that the bible is intended to be lived out, not just talked about. With Psalm 31 and with others recently, it seems that the bible is also to be lived in. I think that I may have mentioned here that because of my lack of resources for a house, I can now relate better to how Gideon felt when the Lord reduced his men to next to nothing compared to the Midianite army (Judges 7:7)
I went through Psalm 31 and saw all the things that I have at least a measure of understanding. Verse 10 is one of the verses. But I have given up at times, thinking that I have done all that I know to do. In those times, v5 means a lot. In those same times, v15 does as well.
I know the panic of v22
“As for me, I said in my alarm,
“I am cut off from before Your eyes”;
Nevertheless You heard the voice of my supplications
When I cried to You.” (NASB)
I long for v8, v16, and v24 to be made real for me (as well as v17, where we started). They are:
“And You have not given me over into the hand of the enemy;
You have set my feet in a large place.”
“Make Your face to shine upon Your servant;
Save me in Your lovingkindness.”
“Be strong and let your heart take courage,
All you who hope in the LORD.”
But there I go, asking for favor again …
Postscript – It is best to read all of Psalm 31, as you can see that David is unsettled. Part of him wants to settle on the reality that he may have trouble seeing. And yet, the reality of what he can see sometimes distracts him. I can so relate.
Jesus Day by Day 