I will still get to the being honest before God dialog that I need to have. He has guided me that it will involve coveting and lust. My religious background makes me want to run and hide. But, I have been doing that to some degree, and it is worse.
I am not separated from Him, but I can’t imagine that He wants to be with me. He has brought me to the realization before, that where I am is where I have made Him in my image. If someone treated me like I treat Him, I would want to slap him. I am afraid that He will want to slap me. That is not His heart at all.
I know that in the logical side of my head, but, I am trusting Him to get it into the relational side of me. To some extent, I need returning daily to meet Jesus in the Daily Prayer of Affirmation, and all the places that He connects to it.
Today, I read Acts 2:25 – 28 (part of Peter’s sermon at Pentacost). The NASB is below.
“For David says of Him,
‘I SAW THE LORD ALWAYS IN MY PRESENCE;
FOR HE IS AT MY RIGHT HAND, SO THAT I WILL NOT BE SHAKEN.
‘THEREFORE MY HEART WAS GLAD AND MY TONGUE EXULTED;
MOREOVER MY FLESH ALSO WILL LIVE IN HOPE;
BECAUSE YOU WILL NOT ABANDON MY SOUL TO HADES,
NOR ALLOW YOUR HOLY ONE TO UNDERGO DECAY.
‘YOU HAVE MADE KNOWN TO ME THE WAYS OF LIFE;
YOU WILL MAKE ME FULL OF GLADNESS WITH YOUR PRESENCE.’
If you are like me. You read primarily that Acts 2:27 prophesies God’s plan to raise Jesus.
But look at the rest.
This is why Jesus died for you. It is not just for David. Pause every time you read “I” or “me” in verses 25,26,28. I am not saying that v27 doesn’t apply to us, it is just that verses 25,26,28 can apply to you and me right now. If some of them don’t feel true right now, ask Him to indelibly make them relationally true for you.
Jesus, relationally, open my eyes to see You always in my presence.
Jesus, relationally, by your presence, help me to know the reality of not being shaken.
Jesus set my heart free to be glad, to say so, to worship You anywhere and everywhere, and to sing to You, and about You, even as a contented beloved sings to themselves.
Jesus, living in hope is so, so big. It is abundant life, that You have promised. It is alive. It doesn’t shrink back from death. It does not disappoint. It endures, right along with love and faith. And like faith, we can rejoice when there is but a seed of hope, because You are in and with the seed.
Jesus, I have everything that I need. You are The Way, The Truth, and The Life. And I do not walk this way alone. From the beginning, You have always intended to walk it with me. My heart overflows with gratefulness, gladness, generosity, love, and forgiveness, because Your heart overflows to mine.
So, from all of this, where does the daily prayer of affirmation come in. Well, I have it bookmarked in my Becoming What You Believe workbook. And there I wrote in empty space “Is there a place to ask to see Him, … near. To feel Him, … hold my heart. To be warmed by His smile … His gaze. To be grateful, for an eternity of this closeness, tenderness, and affection. Holy Spirit helps me weave it it.
